3 Essential Keys that will open a woman’s Mind, Heart, and, Yoni together.

Presence – Patience – Power

Presence:  For most women, arousal starts with the heart. She yearns to feel a connection that lets her know that she is seen and honored. Even when honoring the Queen within yourself, it’s essential to be fully present with your body so you can experience the more subtle and profound sensations.

When a man is in his head fantasizing he is not present. Nor is thinking about anything that distracts him from feeling, to avoid cuming too soon…  the key element of connection gets lost.

Without connection sex is reduced is mutual masturbation which reduces the experience to mere physical friction to get off;  instead of nurturing a loving connection.

The more beautiful and cherished a woman feels, in the eyes of her beloved, the more able she is to blossom fully in the warmth of love. I’ve experienced that when I’m fully present to being seen by my partner that awareness sends incredible tingling pleasure, like sparkling champagne bubbles up from my yoni to my crown.

The amazing thing is that this can occur sometimes even without physical touch because it blossoms from the emotion of feeling connection inside first. The excitement that stirs is so rich in its mysterious alluring depths, that it sparks energy even without touch.

From that state physical touch becomes supercharged and penetration pierces straight through to the heart like cupid’s arrow. Just knowing that she is valued and loved unconditionally helps her to relax and feel safe enough to open wide. Uneducated men often do what feels good to them which is a rapid thrusting of a woman’s vagina which can feel incredible at the right time and painful when she’s not open.

This has caused many women to shut down and resist sex because when she’s not receptive in order to protect that which she holds sacred. Like a flower, you can’t force her to open on demand. There’s an energetic opening that occurs when a woman receives her beloved into her heart.

Hard thrusting can be incredibly orgasmic, when she’s open she will naturally invite deep penetration to open completely and receive your wildest passions.

Deep to the core of her being to her os and beyond, where life literally comes from. Os is the opening of a woman’s womb. I call it the O-zone. O for opening, because whether or not she has still a womb, the opening to the source up the spine and through the kundalini channel remains energetically present.

An artist of loving touch can encourage a woman to open and discover places she never knew existed! With care, every stroke can build waves of arousal that slowly but steadily flood the body with bliss.

And to do that requires patience:

Patience.  I encourage my clients to explore themselves to find their own rhythm and pace that fuels luxuriously delicious to them so that when met with their partner, they can knowingly guide them to slow down enough so that she may tune in to her pleasurable depths.

This is especially important in the early stages of arousal when the desire is just beginning to stir.

Start slowly to awaken her desire by arousing all of her erogenous zones. Make an effort to explore more than the primaries because each erogenous zone holds its unique hidden pleasures. And they’re all delicious to discover which increases arousal and the desire for deep intimate bonding in total surrender

Delve deep enough to discover os pleasures that are possible yet dormant in every woman. Yearning to be awakened.

Women blossom best when they can relax d-e-e-p-l-y and let their bodies respond and open to the delicate sensations of opening all the layers of her desire, she then oozes the fragrant essence of the goddess.

Breathe deep together and feel the sensations grow from subtle to sublime!

If you don’t know what they need at the moment, as they’re always different… ASK! Don’t be afraid to explore. It’s fun to discover pleasure together and it empowers your partner to be your Sex-God!

A man who loves you is happiest when he can make you happy!   So don’t be shy or afraid to ask what your body needs. Learn to listen to your body and guide your partner so you can co-create a win.

She/He will thank you!

Make it an adventure to discover and transform numbness into pleasure. Pain and sadness when released and resolved can turn into clear light energy! That’s exciting! Healing and rejuvenating, it doesn’t have to be hard to let go of the past trauma when there is a love net that supports you. You can learn to create that love net so that you’re always protected from within. When you’re not the victim, you can reclaim your pleasure beyond your wildest dreams. And why wouldn’t you?

If you or someone you know yearns to feel more deeply, I am creating a course with coaching just for you. Because when you’re in a safe container supported but ones who know the way, you can grow exponentially feeling secure enough to break out of the patterns that block you repeatedly.

As we mirror each other, we are reminded of our divine essence seen in the eyes of clear ones who love you unconditionally. See you for your fullest potential and who you are meant to be who you can become and help you hold that space until you fully embody it. I take a stand for you evolving into all that you desire to be.

You can learn techniques of sexual healing that you can use when trauma is activated.  This is discussed in-depth in group programs. Private coaching, in-person or virtual seminars up to Certified Education at the Source School of Tantra. You can find many trained teachers here and lots of great content. So get support if it becomes overwhelming.

Women’s vaginas are like flowers! Before they blossom they need warmth and time to open naturally with desire!!

If there are glitches in her ability to feel fully responsive, which may be felt as pain or numbness instead of pleasure, know that those are wounds coming up from the past that can be healed in the power of the present.

Power: Imagine what life would be like if you were told when you were young, that you have a magic wand between your legs. This wand can light your path of illumination clarity and the desire to awaken your woman’s body and do amazing things to her; which will light you up even more. Also true for a man who loves to love men.

This wand of light and tremendous power can be a great teacher and healer.  So listen, honor, and learn from it wisely.

Here’s a tip to help you spread potent pleasure throughout your whole body.

Imagine that your erection is connected from your base up your spine.

Orgasms can rise up to your crown when your spine when it’s flowing without obstructions. Practicing yoga, stretching and massage are all valuable to help you clear the blocks and transmute.

Many of us are heavy with muscle memories that cause tension and stress which prevent us from feeling full body pleasure. Through massage and active movement of the spine, you can begin to raise your orgasmic ability.

My client tells me that it’s like having a full body erection!  6 feet instead of 6 inches gives you a lot more room for pleasure to expand.

So hold the vision of pleasure rising up your spine and when you feel arousal breathe it up your spine… while moving your spine to invite the sensation of pleasure inward and upward!

The benefits of this are vast as it rises it nourishes the organs in your body. Ancient Taoists and Tantric and others have known this for ages. It’s time we all awaken and discover the power of pleasure within our whole bodies.

Your thoughts are your greatest erotic trigger. So instead of fantasizing to get off, try this out instead. Visualize your erotic energy as healing light. Let it fill your belly.

Breathe deeply inviting pleasure to rise inward, opening yourself to be filled with rejuvenating life forces!

Try connecting arousal throughout your body, or to any part that ails you for healing energy to be delivered there.

You will find that your wand starts to have a wider range of sensations which helps you last longer.  And live longer with a whole lot more love and laughter!

If you’d like more guidance in this journey of awakening, I would love to support your quest!

I offer private coaching and forming a group this fall. Please inquire if you’re interested.

This is the question that I get asked the most.

It is possible that a man can have multiple orgasms without ejaculating. It’s not about withholding the orgasm, as some staunch traditionalists or unenlightened people might think; it’s really about diverting the ejaculation, inward and outward so that it turns into streams of pleasurable energy that can look and feel orgasmic, but without the release! Through deep relaxation and focus of the mind a man can become not just Multi-Orgasmic… but also Full Body Orgasmic! (more…)

Here is a News Piece I did for Telemundo TV:

In this #MeToo era, sexual healing and education is crutial to our evolution. So much is coming out of the shadows. I learned Tantra and became a Sex Surrogate partner because I knew I was wounded from sexual assults and needed healing. I learned as I healed my own sexual wounds, so I could help others who have any sexual trauma whether it be physical, psychological or emotional…
 

We can be traumatized by actions as well as words that condemn our primal desires to make us feel bad for having sexual desires. This is especially true for women who have been conditioned from a very early age to deny our sexual urges and to resist advances from others — instead of redirecting these attempts into a win-win.

This causes sexual tension that can be destructive and lead to sexual violence as I experienced in my own journey. When I forgave the perpetrators by realizing that they were products of a dark and unenlightened society, I was able to embrace true sexual healing and to forgive men in general. This allowed me to move beyond victim/perpetrator and develop a deep understanding and acceptance so that I can support others in their sexual healing as well.

I invite you to comment and if you wish to speak with me further, I welcome conversations on this shadowy subject that in many countries is either banned or under tight scrutiny. Even social medias have strict rules and guidelines that you put this video in a gray area. Let’s bring sexuality and pleasure back into the light of empowerment so we can bring more joy into this world at this time. Your feedback is appreciated. Like and share if you think this is important and valueable.

Do you, or someone you love, struggle to let go… chasing after orgasms?

OR – Do you/they disconnect, disassociate or simply zone-out during sex?

Do you sometimes feel Pain or Numb, during Sex?  Have you or your partner ever been a victim of sexual violation, rape or domestic violence? I’ve worked with many cases where these symptoms, are signs of unresolved sexual trauma.

Physical or verbal abuses can cause blocks to pleasure and orgasms, even with loving advances, from your current partner.

Abuse leaves an imprint in our memory that can render us disconnected from feelings of love.  We “check-out” to avoid the memories which obstructs present time intimacy. This is a common shield to block and try to forget the past. The problem is these shields prevent us from feeling, even when we desire intimacy.

Traumatizing experiences leave imprints of fear that block us from feeling physical or emotional connections. Even years later with another partner, the memories of abuse linger in the cells of our body  until they are discharged.

This cellular memory, also referred to as muscle memory creates patterns of tension based on how we responded to sex. 

These negative imprints need to be discharged in order to make space for more positive ones.  Like a “sexorcism”, first removing the ghosts of trauma past. Then you can have a total Sex Life Makeover and be free to love with your whole body, heart and soul.

I know this process firsthand, because I’ve been through the fire of transformation myself. And I’ve developed the compassion and capability to help thousands of others.  In my 30 years of being in service and dedicated to sexual healing I’ve helped men and women to transform their pain and numbness of shame, into life-changing pleasure.

I help couples as well as individuals address trauma related sexual issues. This work has created massive interest and opportunities for me to reach numerous men and women, who want and need my help.

Pop culture is ripe with references to women being multi-orgasmic. Women are generally more sensual, sensitive, and nurturing than men. It is discouraging for a man to be told that you are not capable of being able to connect at the same heights as your female partner.

Most men have experienced, at one point or another, dissatisfactory sex. It is easy to put the pressure on yourself, “I have to perform! I have to make her orgasm! I have to be the best lover she has ever had! A modern-day Casanova.” Despite this, many men suffer from premature ejaculation, difficulty getting or maintaining an erection, delayed ejaculation, or simply not quite knowing what to do once “it’s in.” You learn that you are supposed to be dominant. “Be a man,” they say. But what does it mean to be a man?

Is it possible that men are capable of attaining the same mental, emotional, and spiritual heights as women through sexual expression? We look to explore this concept through the concept of multiple orgasms.

It is difficult to enjoy the experience of having sex with a loved one when you are worried about when you will ejaculate. The harder you try to suppress the urge, the quicker you ejaculate. Plus, you are not able to be fully present because of the constant worry over cumming too soon. When it happens, you become apologetic, “I’m so sorry,” or make up excuses, “This usually never happens! It’s been awhile. I’m actually good… I just haven’t done it in a while.”

The truth is, this is all a mask for a lack of sexual mastery. It is difficult for men to speak about these struggles with one another, so they bury it deep into their subconscious, only to have it arise when entering a new relationship with a woman and having to face that dragon all over again. Most men are ill-equipped to have these types of conversations, and it’s not something spoken about in traditional American schools.

Wouldn’t it be great if you didn’t have to worry about having an orgasm, because another one was around the bend?

Well you don’t have to worry or wait in anguish for the next round. In Tantra you can come without going away. This is so liberating as it takes you out of the worry zone and deeply into the moment, where ease and flow create!

It’s amazing when orgasm does not mean that you have to loose your power and wait in sheer embarrassment praying for your penis to become erect again…

Most guys have sex for a few minutes and then come, falling asleep in the arms of his unsatisfied lover. There is much truth to this stereotype. Men typically become tired after ejaculating, and the process of refraction is scientifically normal in men. It takes time for the blood to flow back into the penis. Mentally, men are “checked out” once they ejaculate, and it takes time for them to become mentally aroused again. They are satiated, and have to work up an appetite to go for multiple rounds.

The truth about multiple orgasms for men is that they are possible, but it takes training and commitment. It takes self-control. It is not about withholding the orgasms, as some traditionalists may advise.

Rather, it is about diverting the ejaculation, inward and outward, so that it can build into an ongoing stream of pleasurable energy that may look and feel like an orgasm, but does not involve an ejaculatory release. Attaining this level of sexual mastery requires deep relaxation and focus. Through learning this process, a man can not only become multi-orgasmic, but experience an entirely new sensation: a whole body orgasm!

Ordinary “friction sex” consists of experiencing the orgasm and ejaculation simultaneously. However, these sensations are actually separate functions which stem from opposite sides of the nervous system. It is possible, with training, to experience these two sensations independent of one another.

It is possible for a man to ejaculate without feeling much physical pleasure at all. Most men have experienced this at least once in their lives. Therefore, it must be possible that a man can increase the pleasure volume while decreasing the sense of urgency to release.

To be clear, multiple orgasms and full body orgasms are not the same thing. Men who experience multiple orgasms frequently enjoy pleasurable sensations that are similar to those women feel during a session of multiple orgasms. They report a sense of lightness and tingling that radiates warmth throughout their bodies, carrying with it a nourishing energy that flows through their entire being. This expanded state of arousal can last and last, indefinitely!

The practice of Tantra teaches us that prolonged, multiple orgasms can occur without the feelings of depletion, tiredness, and lethargy that often follow ejaculation.

In ordinary Western sex, a man is spent after he ejaculates a single time, especially after the age of 35 when his hormone levels begin to decline. During an ejaculation, a man loses significant amounts of proteins, vitamins, minerals, and vital life forces. Many major stories point to this mysterious “life force,” from religions to Greek myths. Any man who has gone a week without masturbating can attest to increased energy—that is the “life force” in reference here. This extra energy, joie de vivre.

After an ejaculation, the brain releases sleep hormones, which lead to what I like to call “snorgasms” often complained about by women in their therapists’ offices.

The word “orgasm” is derived from ancient Greek, and means, “to become engorged; a fullness and ripeness that can occur in any organ of the body.” This is different than the modern definition of “orgasm.” However, the ancient Greek definition is quite similar to the Tantric view. In Tantra, the orgasm is not the goal that results at the culmination of a sexual experience. Rather, it a state of aroused awareness that can occur literally anywhere and everywhere throughout the body.

The practice of Tantra teaches us how to reach this physical, mental, and spiritual state by being receptive to the energy flowing through us. By focusing on this energy, we can become deeply aroused while remaining mentally present and centered from within.

This state of mind is the cornerstone for experiencing amazingly satisfying orgasmic experiences. There is simply no “goal” or “performance” to work towards. Rather, this experience is about fully enjoying what is happening in the present moment. This allows men to approach sex from a stance that is anxiety-free, and enjoy any type of sex they wish to have with the sexual partner. They can choose to have quick, passionate sex, but now it will be just that: a choice. They do not have to be slaves to their basic sexual instinct. They can also choose to have slow, intimate sex where they connect with their partner in a way not possible when driven by instinct alone.

The more men and women linger in this state together, the more energy and vitality we are able to absorb, further revitalizing us. This type of orgasm is deep, limitless, and a constant source of powerful energy that can be transmuted into every aspect of life, from creative pursuits to tending to loved ones.

While men cannot control the actual climax once it is occurring, they can learn to ride its waves and experience the immense pleasure and joy it brings. It is similar to a swimmer learning to surf: while he cannot control the ocean, the surfer learns to connect to the power of the ocean. Instead of being overcome by incoming waves, the surfer can eventually become skillful end mindful enough to play with the waves, enjoying the ride.

Maintaining a heightened level of pleasure throughout a series of non-ejaculatory, yet orgasmic, sexual experiences provides numerous benefits to the mind and body. This, in the Tantric view, frequent ejaculation can be depleting because the process of ejaculation causes the man to lose vital energies and nutrients.

On the other hand, after a session of sustaining a high level of pleasure, but not ejaculating, a man can actually feel rejuvenated and energized in the afterglow.

Everyone is entitled to experiencing the pleasure their own bodies allow. I do not agree with austere Taoists who profess that men should never ejaculate unless the intention is procreation. Most men find these methods much too technical, making it difficult to follow through with the practice with any degree of success, or pleasure, for that matter. Not to mention the difficult position it places women in to be in a relationship with a man who is practicing these techniques. It is not sexy, to say the least.

This type of belief is also popular in conservative religions, often viewing pleasure as hedonistic and, ultimately, sinful. This is a negative view of sexual experience that has proven unhealthy for humanity again and again.

I do believe that when the ejaculation occurs as a final state of highly orgasmic interaction, it should be done consciously, with wisdom and intention. When a man “plants his seed” along with an intentional thought or vision, it becomes infused with the creative life force, whether the goal is to create a baby, or to create an empowered reality.

The path to becoming a multi-orgasmic male requires discarding many former modes of thinking, such as envisioning the man as the dominant “performer” in the relationship, who has to give his partner orgasms and fuck her all night long like a character out of a pulp novel. The true experience of multi-orgasmic sex is actually more pleasurable, and satisfying, than any of these pulp authors can even imagine.

It means actually experiencing pleasure in new ways. It requires commitment, mental practice, and an openness to learning new facets of your body. Your body has more features than you currently know. Following the Tantric methods outlined in my blog posts, and taught at my seminars, provides a plan to learning how to develop into a man who is truly confident in their sexuality, and can give and receive pleasure beyond the norm. The path to male multiple orgasms is not easy, but it surely is worth the effort.

How you feel in the afterglow of sex often indicates how great the sex really was! [Or not] Sex can either give you energy or drain you. It’s all in how we relate to pleasure in the 1st place. Orgasms come in many shapes and sizes – from quickies to gourmet pleasure feasts that can  last a looong time. The 1st one is like fast food that fills a need but you can’t really thrive on it.

Quickies can scratch an itch and relieve tension, helping one let go and fall asleep fast… I call these “snorgasms”.

Whereas a gourmet feast of pleasure leave men feeling loved, nourished and better than when they started. Usually with more energy and  creative ideas.

*’Core-Gasms’ help men discover: How to last long enough to please his partner and come together more. Without falling asleep soon after sex.

Coming from your core means your body, mind and soul are engaged, connecting all of your being. Starting with your mind connecting with your body to feel deep, relaxed arousal, a state of sexy stillness within. Peaceful pleasure that grows as you cultivate it! Lasting Indefinitely! Feeling tingly all over. Many can get a rush of excitement just thinking about these experiences because they imprint so profoundly deep.

F#@!ed to the CORE of your being! The place where the more you open, the deeper and more delicious it is!? Feeling loved wide open… coming from the very deepest part of your body, mind and soul, where sex is sacred.

Core-gasms open the gates of heaven within. Coming from the inside out, is how my lover described it to me from his perspective and we agree that it is more powerful than from just physical stimuli alone. Core-gasms are very emotionally and satisfying. The afterglow can last indefinitely

It’s this kind of orgasm that women crave yet most women don’t know how to ask for it, yet!!

However it is innate for women yet in most it requires some clearing of shame-based or manipulation sex roles that women have been ingrained with, in order to access deep to the Core-gasm. It satisfies like nothing else.  Transforming fear into positive pleasure energy, and burdens into blissful abundance.

Most importantly Core-gasms really helps men and women come together when they share this experience. Which can help develop a very deep emotional and spiritual connection. Sharing quality pleasures that benefit your entire being, integrating body, mind and soul sex.

It’s a fact that the more turned on you are the more magnetic you become. Core-gasm as a self love ritual is a super beneficial gift to give yourself, and your partner. It makes you feel good in a way that others feel and are drawn to… Personally. And professionally tooIn!

I help my clients tap into this orgasmic energy state through using breath, movement and sound techniques combined with their intensions so they can have greater access to pleasure and can last as long as they want! I’ve developed this system over 30 years of hands-on clinical practice working with men and my advanced studies in Tantric and Taoist methods of increasing potency, prolonging pleasure and personal empowerment.

My Coming Alive Whole Body Core-gasm Workshop techniques are, based on ancient Tantra wisdom and can clear every chakra from the bottom to the top to your brain which can address underlying issues as well as reboot the body to help people stay young and vital.

Core-gasms open the channel to clearing debris and tapping into that tingly pleasure center from the inside out. We all already have the Elixir inside for longevity and that is orgasmic life force energy. When it’s not directed toward creating life it can uplift the quality of our own life and infuse our desires with magnetic energy.

One of my clients calls this core-gasm feeling a “whole body erection.” Others say they feel super activated on every level and get that  invincible feeling. They feel tingly and alive by unleashing the powers of pleasure up and down their spine.

Core-gasms awaken deep felings that go way beyond physical pleasure / orgasms.  They connect us to our source and to one-another in a unifying field. That’s one of the reasons why high sex is so exhilarating — because it connects us to the very core of our being. The longer we sustain that state of relaxed arousal the more it invigorates us. Rather than feeling the need to sleep afterwards one often feels inspired! Energized… Like bathing in bliss! Pure orgasmic life force energy!!

For couples, core-gasm techniques clear both partners so they can more easily become an open channel of love; free of filters and history.

Instead of getting overly excited… When a man can relax and enjoy pleasure, he can also control how long he lasts before releasing or losing his erection. This way, he and his partner can enjoy multiple pleasures with ease and confidence. Core-gasms can help clear emotional trauma prior to having sex, so they can feel loved and supported.

This is when couples can truly come together. In body mind and soul — both partners feeling truly loved and satisfied to the core.

* ‘Corgasm’ is also a term used to describe orgasms that seem to occur from exercises or movements that engage the core abdominal muscles… What I describe is similar and much more because it can also be activated by the mind and felt in more than just your abdominal core from exercises. It sometimes occurs with words of love and endearment and can be felt in the core of your heart as well. The sweetest Core-gasms are the ones that connect the heart and sex center, blessed with words of love and passion!

Please join me FREE! As my Valentines gift to you on Feb. 13th  just in time for Valentine’s Day to give to yourself. So you can empower your life with pleasure… learn how to activate ecstasy within, alone or with someone you love!! I will offer this monthly on the 13th of every month.

Here’s how:

Coming Alive Whole Body Core-gasm with Mare Simone (www.maresimone.com) will be broadcast live from 7-8 p.m. PST on Monday, Feb. 13 on Mare Simone’s Making Love Magical YouTube channel.and Tues Feb 14 at 1-2 PM  Follow @MareSimone on Twitter along with the #ComingAlive #wholebody #core-gasm with #PleasureCoach  The recording will be available if you want to share ir or can’t join us live!

#MareSimone. To follow Mare Simone’s latest workshops, videos and media appearances, friend her on Facebook at Mare Simone in Tantra Heaven. To book Pleasure Coach Mare Simone for speaking engagements and interviews email: mare@maresimone.com. For private coaching sessions email: Tantramare@Gmail.com or visit: www.maresimone.com.

About Mare Simone

Mare Simone CTE (www.maresimone.com) is a master pleasure coach. Passionate about empowering people to use the pleasure arts for truly coming alive, Simone is America’s foremost advanced Tantra educator (CTE) and certified sex surrogate who has been featured on AOL, NBC, ABC, HBO’s Real Sex, E!,

The Playboy Channel and many more. Based in Southern California, Simone travels the globe leading Tantra and Coming Alive Whole Body Core-gasm workshops, teleseminars and cruises as well as maintaining her private sex therapy practice. She has been a pioneer in the field of sexual awakening and surrogacy since the 80s after studying Classical Tantra Kriya Yoga with Sunyata Saraswati and Bodhi Avinasha along with being an apprentice with sex therapist and sex education filmmaker Dr. Michael Perry MFCC. Simone founded LA’s Tantra Connection in 1989 where she established a Tantra community and sponsored some of the world’s top Tantra masters. In 1993, Simone began an extensive apprenticeship and practice with famed Tantra teachers and authors, Charles and Caroline Muir. She continues to assist and work privately with the students of Muirs’ Source School of Tantra Yoga. Simone has appeared in numerous educational videos and documentaries including Tantra.com’s Ancient Secrets for Modern Lovers and TLC’s Strange Sex.

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Are you ready to go beyond quickies and discover the world of  #SlowGourmetSex?

We’ve all heard about slow food, and you may or may not have heard about other “slow movement” subcategories, like slow parenting, slow education, slow design, and even slow fashion. It’s not the newest trend, but as the idea of slow living becomes less hippie-dippy and fringe, it’s gaining more legitimacy and interest in mainstream culture. And for good reason.

Slow sex is, as you might guess, a subset of the slow movement that rethinks our instinct to get laid and get off. It’s an umbrella term that can include more specific sexual philosophies or practices, including Tantra and Orgasmic Meditation. In a time when efficiency and productivity are highly valued, the concept of intentionally hitting the brakes on anything—let alone sex, which is naturally sort of frenzied—feels counterintuitive. Slow sex is about reprogramming ourselves to savor the moment with our partners. But that doesn’t mean that you have to turn it in to a sappy, saccharine “lovemaking” scenario.

“Comparing slow sex to a quickie is like comparing fast food to a seven-course gourmet feast,” says California-based Advanced Certified Tantra Educator Mare Simone, a teacher at the Source School of Tantra. “Slowing down the sexual experience invites a more expansive awareness that engages all of the senses and erogenous zones that are often forgotten when we’re in a hurry to climax. Slower sex has fewer goals in mind and often leads to a wider range of pleasures.” That’s not to say there’s anything wrong with short-lived sex. Quickies can relieve tension, stress, and help you sleep better, says Simone—just know that if all you ever have are quickies, you’re definitely missing out.

One big benefit to slowing sex down is that it can help bridge a natural sexual gap between the sexes, if you’re in a heterosexual relationship. (If you’re not, skip to the next paragraph, because there are still plenty of other benefits for you!) “Men are hardwired to procreate the species, so they instinctually climax quickly—often sooner than they or their partners would like,” says Simone. “Women, on the other hand, are naturally inclined to crave slower, more sensual, and foreplay-driven sex, including a wider range of pleasures and often multiple orgasms.”

Another thing that might motivate you to slow things down between the sheets: It’s much likelier to get women off. “According to statistics, 70 percent of women have difficulty achieving orgasm reliably through intercourse,” says Simone. “Women generally respond best to having all her erogenous zones stimulated before the primary ones.” In other words, having your lips, ears, nipples, and even your toes attended to before your clit.

“Slowing down to enjoy every nuance of erotic pleasure creates a richer, longer-lasting feeling of physical fulfillment that rejuvenates, nourishes, and heals the body, making us look and feel more vibrant for hours after the fact,” says Simone. “The uplifting benefits of slower sex can linger for days, improving your overall quality of life, from mental clarity to a glow that looks better than makeup.” Sold yet?
For slow sex beginners, Mare suggests taking turns exploring less-obvious erogenous zones, starting with the feet and hands, then the toes and fingers, then behind the knees and elbows. “Arousing these areas can increase the pleasure through anticipation, ultimately leading to the primary pleasures of the genitals,” she says. “Teasing is a great turn-on because the brain is the biggest erogenous zone and plays a major role in arousal.” For more beginner’s tips, check out Mare’s tantric sexercises or this surprisingly helpful Reddit feed.

Oh, and if you think you’re too busy to spend hours getting yourself or a partner off, you might want to think again. “Some people claim they don’t have enough time for long, luxurious lovemaking,” says Mare. “I believe that they just don’t know what they’re missing.

Published in: http://stylecaster.com/what-is-slow-sex/#ixzz4NBoyFD3d

  by  HANNAH HICKOK  160 SHARES